I am now sitting on my chair, blogging about how lazy and uninspired i get when it comes to exams. i am suppose to do chemistry questions now. but i think i ll safe that for the midnight..now i think i just wanna laze around prob even type out my uni essays.. COZ i realli dun hv the mood rite now..

Btw i have just been wondering whether do i stand any chance of getting admitted into UCLA. i mean i really wanna go thr..it beautiful, expensive, competitive and its beatiful, owh did i say that already?? haha...great place..who wouldnt wanna go there...currently i am just working on my essays points and details i am planning to include in my personal statement...

Gotto Make it There!!!!

POST-SAT...Finally...

SAT is over...fewwww(sigh of relief) It was relatively easier than the previous one I did...must be the experience or probably the fact that i actuallli did some sort of revision before hand...any how i am glad its over...gona take a break today from any work or prep and just indulge myself in a long. long sleep...

SAT Tomorrow...muahahaha...

What do you do when you have SAT the next day? Blog? Duh!!! (Bitchy yea!) Newayz, updating after a while now and honestli the oni reason why i am bloging is cuz i hv got SAT tomoro. I mean i am not sure if there is nothing else left to be done now.

I am leaving tomoro at 6am. So gotto sleep early...Just wanna sleep and do SAT and eat GOOD FOOD outside !!! Yea!!!

Well, other than SAT, I've got TOEFL next sunday. then General Paper examination next monday and AS papers around the corner. Basically it is the Examination Period and i guess i ll do fine in this sit compared to the previous one. I mean i dint realli take the previous sit seriousli. So for this one i am sure i ll do better but i definitely nid to continue working hard (hopefulli that happens)

Hmm.. for the past few months life has been up and down, left and right and last but not least FUCK and DEEP SHIT. That basically summarizes how the past few months has been in KTJ. Super difficult in the first few weeks cz was occupied with IU and the trauma of my 'fabulous' results and the consistently low self-esteem. Not to forget a bit of in-the-heart drama and a few emo sessions.

But things are looking up...there are signs of excellence written all over this term..its all up to me now...oh and my faith in GOD has been augmented. Was going through a rough patch and i practically lost my patience and started to question His presence as well as His wisdom? is that the right word? i am not realli sure... but my faith in God has been restored by none other than Mr Lai who celebrated his birthday today. Happy Birthday Mr Lai !!!

I go for this society called Christian Fellowship and I am still an Hindu but u noe Mr Lai just strengthens God's presence in all of those who attend.

Ok lah..i wanna go off now..wanna flip a few pages of SAT notes then Gud Night Mantin !!!

Gud luck to everybody taking SAT tmr. I'll pray for all of your success...

Take care...

Happy Birthday, Syadhisy

Damn..birthday started off with Interact work..i was working on a video montage for teachers day to be presented on monday assembly..started roughly around 11.30pm till 3am ish..n it was just a 1 minute 11 seconds video...arghhhh...but then of course what would a birthday be without early wishes..LMC, vimal, Nitiya, Salina, Thanges, Xia Wei, Azim and many more..thanks guys..

Then work up in the morning only to get punches from Chang Kyoung n Sam Otto..its a like a tradition in NAZ whereby u punch the guy during his bday..n Sam is one hell of a tractor..he's like Krishna size but shorter...so imagine how much of power was thr in his three punches??!!!!

Then of course there is Haziq..SHIT!!! like Sam n Krisna but way stronger..another three punches..but muahaha...WEIGHTS help!!! having been doing weights so my arms were immune to the punches..hehe..then went to sixth form centre..to see the final video piece for the teachers day dedication..

It turned out reali awesome...Great work by the 2009-2010 Interactors!!!! hehe..newayz went for lunch...n Kelvin couldnt keep his restless ass on the sit..went around dining hall to tell evryone it was my bday..then like wat dey alwiz do they sing the Birthday Song...as annoying as u are Kelvin i still thank you for your efforts...

then went back to sixth form to fix a few things in the video...then allia came along...we all sat down there from lik i duno when till 3 pm ish..jz talking and chatting...then studied..i thk..it dint seem like much to me..but honestly i'hv never studied tat much since coming bak for the second term...and yet i feel like i havent studied anything...

well..to be honest thr is no exam atmosphere here...its just another normal day during the examination..even for exams as important as A levels are basically NTH??? i mean there is absolutely no pressure..its either u pressure yourself or u dunt study...simple as that..

i was slightly dissapointed not getting wished early or not getting wished at all by a few people..but of course lah...im still grateful to all my frens here in ktj and the ones in bm..thank you all for your wishes...maybe next year i'll throw my first and definitely my last birthday party in KTJ...it mite or it mite not happen...but damn thr is the EXAMS next year..A2 summore..

I jz cant help but not to think how my next one year in ktj is going to be like, especially during my bday..it written BUSY all over it..IU DAY, Hse singing, OBS!!! and prefects duties but rounding around ktj on saturday nights shld be fun...hehe at night sial!!!

but trust me when i say with the right bunch of people and frens all these activities are nothing more than memories you wouldnt want to let go...but of course..for it to become memories, it has to happen first..mine will prob end badly..hehe...

So yea...thx for all your wishes !!! take care... n c ya all soon...and dont forget

NOT to study...

I'm Relaxed...

Today yea..im relaxed..way too relaxed...came back from chem extra class, straight away slept on my bed...i was just too tired...mentally...i oni had few hours of sleep the previous night..so yea..had to sleep..slept til 7pm...then woke up with a decision..a decision to attend PROM...



I have absolutely no idea how in the world or why in the world did i decide to go for prom right after waking up from a random evening sleep..prob it's a sign from GOD...hehe...but yea..im goin..its confirmed..so girls beware..thr a wild guy on the loose..n he's prob gonna

RUIN YOUR NIGHT !!!

OKlah...i thk i wanna go study now...haih..im gona end up becoming the worst form of geek in my life..the one that stays up the whole night to study PHYSICS !!!

Newayz i got a few messages to a few people before i sleep...first and foremost smile..for finally giving up his blogging antics(oni for the exam season)..he is actually studying these days..secondly to all Petronas scholars in KTJ..Good luck for your exams..same goes to BSN n KTJ scholars..to Salina, Daphnie, Ka Liang, to all of the Naz Sixth form, basically to everyone..

Last but not least VOON HUI..u've been worrying a lot of people lately...take care and get lots of rest will you...u wouldnt wan to be sick during the exam season do u..so yea..take care..

TO the rest, i'll say : GOOD NIGHT n loosen up in my life..comitments ands responsibilities come n go in life...but u'll oni have this lifetime to chill out and relax..so enjoy life, enjoy the pressure...learn to live with it...tc..

This post was written on the 13th of May 2009...couldnt post it as "Connection was denied"...

- Busy - Away - Available -

When her status is busy, she never replies..one would think that she is really busy or away..but then i wonder again, she’s got time to update her pm but not reply!!!

Yea pm is lot more important isn’t it...!!!

This is how fucked up i can be....i get ANNOYED with smallest of things including this one...

Back in KTJ

Spent yesterday and today (come back at 6.30pm) in my cousins' house..Quite fun actualli.. celebrated my birthday a week earlier and celebrated mothers' day including all of my aunties and my grandma..there was so much of noise in the house...haha....realli had fun...but now im back in ktj..back where all the "real fun" is about to begin...exams in another week or so...

I have been questioning myself...all this while..all the while i have been in ktj..why am i here? why did i choose to accept the scholarship offer when i realli wanted to do civil engineering and then go on to structural engineering? Why do i even bother studying when its known that im not going to be living up my dream?

I keep asking myself this questions...i have this tremendous urgency to answer these questions...only when i answer these questions i can realli sit down and study and probably move on(look up the last few sentences of my previous blog)...

I started looking for the answers about last week or so..but honestli i cant realli find any...am i doing it for my parents or for the sake of my very own future?? i mean at tat time petronas was the only option i had..form6 NVR!!! matriks?? petronas was a way bttr option...so i took it..i took it cz it was the oni option i had..had nth else to hang on to...

Now, here am i....blogging bout my pathetic decision-making that prob caused my life, my career and prob my future spouse (maybe im jz saying...)..im jz struggling to find any sort of inspiration to study..im struggling to get any sort of fire lit up in me...im lacking that extra edge that would eventually make me lethal(haha...i dun mean tat way...)

But these past two days i spent wif my family back in klang...made me realise somethings i shld have realised a long time ago...i would be devastated to dissapoint them...to see that dissapointment on their faces would kill me (a slow death that would finally end with excruciating pain ) and im serious about tis...my family (including aunties uncles cousins especialy my parents n my sisters) have high expectations on me...evryone thinks i ll make it to USA with ease...trust me when i say only i know the pressure behind achieving my so-called "dreams"...

This struggle has a long way to go before it finally ends...the questions will continue to haunt me...but as i said letting down my parents is not an option..letting myself down and giving up hope on what i'm doing now is further pain inflicted on my already injured soul...too poetic or too pathetic??? i leave it to you to judge...

Maybe im on a journey to eternal success?? hehe.. maybe im jz getting started...who knows what i'll achieve in the future..For now im not going to be giving up...have to keep on moving...keep pushing myself harder..(dun worry i wont kill myself under all the 'pushing')

so yea..this post is just something i had to write...something i had write to make myself feel better..the better days are coming..dey better do..haha..

for now the biggest dillema i have in KTJ is "should i or should i not go for PROM???!!!!"